tiger parenting

What if the world was a place where children aimlessly followed the example of their parents… a world where they had no sense of individuality? What if they attempted to speak out? Well, unfortunately for them, their parents would have adopted the authoritarian technique of parenting and would punish their child for being ‘wrong’, and instead allow their sons and daughters to walk around like emotionless robots, anticipating them to obey their every order.

   Parenting can be split into four categories. As a consequence of authoritarian parenting, children become obedient but have a lower self-esteem as their parents don’t permit mistakes, yet they offer little guidance. A frightening image is created in the child’s mind as they follow orders in fear, similar to the dictatorship of Hitler as the Nazis killed anyone who showed any resentment towards the Nazis. Needless to say, children raised like this are likely to portray traits of someone neurotic. You would think it couldn’t get any worse, but psychologists have proven that those who show signs of neuroticism have a criminal personality. Their lack of emotional stability causes them to have daring and irrational thoughts. Sure, obedience is important but would you risk your child becoming a delinquent?

   Permissive parents have low expectations and are communicative but don’t discipline their children, resulting in poorly behaved kids who have a problem with authority and can’t control their emotions. The third type of parents are those who are uninvolved, only fulfilling basic needs like providing them with shelter but the lack of support and guidance leaves little willpower and confidence. They grow up not knowing basic facts about life and since they have no self-esteem, their mental state is destroyed.

   The most effective form is the authoritative approach, where kids are provided with support and feedback but their parents still expect a lot from them. Raising infants in this way allows them to develop independence and self-discipline. An authoritative parent acts as a friend rather than a foe or a stranger.

   Strict and relaxed parents can both make problems for children. A controlling parent makes many rules, with punishments if they aren't followed. Later in life, kids won’t question authority and are more likely to dodge responsibility and follow the majority. They also become excellent liars as they act one way in front of their parents but their attitude changes when their parent isn’t there.

   On the other hand, a relaxed parent doesn’t usually make rules. The relaxed parent raises the child to become a careless rule-breaker. Harsher parents make decisions and help children to behave for a short time but it doesn’t give them an opportunity to solve problems themselves. On the other side of the spectrum, if a child behaves badly, the relaxed parents are never angry, so the child doesn’t learn that their behaviour is wrong: there’s no time for reflection of the consequences of their actions and so the child will most likely have a lack of empathy towards other people.

   Although there are lots of arguments against extreme parenting, there are quite a few of reasons why it can be acceptable. Bringing up children with a strict set of rules gives them opportunities and allows them to be organised, helping them become their best selves. The chance that children raised by extreme parents become successful in their later lives is much higher than those with parents who don’t discipline their kids at all.

   Once parents surpass the limits of parenting, it becomes a hazard as bonds between parent and child become weak and damaged. There will be a lack of communication between them and many important topics will be hard to discuss. The child will be restricted from being a child. Although it can affect their future positively, they miss what it feels like to be a child like everyone else. 

   Parents shouldn’t try to change their children because children are only happy when they’re accepted the way they are. Too many rules are hopeless because children need to learn how to solve problems. They should be able to make decisions to learn to manage individually. It’s not good to be very strict or very relaxed. The best parents are those who balance severity and serenity.